Is there a dog in your empty nest?
In the span of six months, we sold our house, moved to Vegas, and sent both kids off to college. Then, our dog died. We weren’t expecting to lose our dog on top of everything else. We didn’t know anything was wrong with little Coconut until we took her to the vet for a “meet and greet” as a new patient. They found a problem with her heart, and a few months later, she was gone.
We always thought Coconut would be our last dog or at least our last dog for a long time. With my BFF hubby John, a.k.a. Cabana John, now able to work from home, we wanted the freedom to travel and not be tied down by a dog. We had no idea she would pass away at such a young age though.
I was in such a state of despair, having just lost so many important parts of my life, that I craved the affection and companionship of a dog. Cabana John is great, but a pet fills a void in a different, unique way. Now, two years later, I’m not sure getting a dog was the best idea, but at the same time, I can’t imagine life without him–the dog that is, not Cabana John.
There are lots of articles discussing dog ownership for empty nesters. I didn’t read any of them. I just jumped right in. Luckily for us, it ended up being a good decision, but for far too many empty nesters, it’s a choice they later regret. You should first consider why you want a dog. Are you looking for affection, security, and/or physical benefits? Let’s chat about the pros and cons.
PROS:
- Physical Fitness
- Boosts Your Mood
- Feeling Useful AGAIN
- Companionship
Exercise helps improve overall fitness
We all know the importance of exercise, but it’s easy to put it off. Dogs don’t care if you’re tired or busy. They need to walk, play, and potty. Whether you take your dog on long walks at the park, quick runs around the block, or just to the mailbox and back, you’re getting movement that your body needs. Having a reason to get out of bed or off the couch to take care of your dog’s needs is huge. Not to mention, the fresh air is good for you!
According to Kramer et al. 2019, exercising your dog has shown to lower blood pressure, improve cardio health, and live a longer, happier life!
Boosts your mood
Spending time with dogs helps regulate your mood and lifts your spirits. Petting them actually releases neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine, which is especially helpful if you are struggling with depression, anxiety, or other mood disorders. Dogs provide great entertainment, too. I could look at pictures and videos of our dog Elvis all day and laugh. He is so goofy, and I just love when he uses his paws like little hands to get our attention.
FACT: Healing benefits of touch
Many people struggle with the lack of touch when they become older, including empty nesters. There may not be others living in the home to give hugs hello or goodnight kisses. Sometimes just having someone, human or canine, to touch is important. This is an interesting article about the magic of touch.
Feeling useful again
Dogs provide a feeling of usefulness, which many parents lack when they become empty nesters. You are, once again, responsible for the wellbeing of someone else. Dogs rely on you to keep them alive and well. Not only are you in charge of their food, water, potty habits, grooming, and vaccines, but also, you need to train them to be well-behaved.
Companionship
Empty nesters often struggle with loneliness when the kids leave. The companionship dogs bring often help alleviate these feelings and increase the hormone oxytocin which is known as a “happy hormone.” Both humans and dogs get a surge in oxytocin when they interact together in a positive way! There is nothing like the unconditional love dogs give. Elvis is also super excited to see me, which makes me feel like the most loved human in the world.
Gets you dates
Researchers have found that dogs are not only your best friend, but can also be your best chance at getting a date. In a recent experiment, men had more luck getting a woman’s phone number if they had a dog with them, and people were more likely to swipe right on Tinder pictures that had dogs in them.
You might not be looking for a date, but the same holds true if you are just looking to make new friends. Dogs can be great conversation starters!
Check out these articles for more dating advice. Cabana John and I have been married since 2001, so I’m a little out of the dating world.
Dogs could help you get a date and make you look more attractive, research finds
Having a Dog in Your Dating Profile Photos Increases Your Chances of Matching, Survey Shows
CONS:
- Travel Limitations
- Downsizing Home
- Money, Money, Money
- Lifespan of a Dog (and you)
Travel Limitations
We would definitely travel more if we didn’t have Elvis. The main thing holding us back from traveling as much as we would like is the guilt we feel for leaving him behind. I’m confident that he’s happy with the dog sitter, so that’s not a concern. I just know he would be happier with us, at home, in his normal routine.
Traveling with your dog is certainly possible. It is just harder. For example, we would like to bring Elvis to Hawaii with us, but between vet visits, quarantine requirements, and the actual transportation of him on a long flight, we aren’t sure it’s worth it. Doing a driving trip with him would be fun, depending on your car and weather, but one of us gets worried about leaving him in hotel rooms and disturbing neighbors. There are TONS of people who love traveling with their dogs. We are hoping to become one of them, but it is something you should think about when adding a dog to your empty nest.
Downsizing Home
Another complication of dog ownership for empty nesters is that lots of us want to downsize when there are only two people living in the house. If you are like us, we now only have a little patch of artificial grass on our back patio, which isn’t ideal for Elvis. Some of our neighbors only have balconies, and they make it work fine. It’s just another thing to consider when you’re balancing out the pros and cons for your own life.
Financials
Dogs are expensive! Not to buy the dog, although that can be the case too, but taking care of a dog is a major financial commitment. Food, toys, grooming, training, vet visits, daycare, boarding, and of course, cute outfits can significantly affect your budget.
Lifespan of Dog
Depending on your age and physical abilities, dogs may outlive you (Do your kids want a dog?). Depending on the breed, some dogs live 15+ years. Just something to think about!
One of the great things about being an empty nester is freedom. When you bring a dog into your life, you lose some of that freedom, but it is replaced with countless other benefits. My advice to you is to think long and hard, then get a dog! I meant to say: think long and hard, and listen to what your heart is telling you.
If your heart is telling you to get a dog, but your brain (or partner) says no, consider other alternatives. Lots of local animal shelters have volunteer programs to foster animals. Consider pet-sitting or just walking your neighbor’s dog occasionally. You’ll benefit from even short interactions with animals, without the long-term commitment.
I’d love to see pictures of your pups! Be sure to follow Elvis on Instagram. He’s just so adorable! Elivstheminibernedoodle
